Instincts..

Im in such a pissy mood, im only writing this in one colour.

Fights, fights and yet more fights.
Im worn out.
Im not gonna be able to do this for much longer.
Me and Josh are on a downward spiral.
I knew it was going to happen, i saw it.
Why didnt i ask Scot for help. : fucking visions.
Sometimes it sucks knowing what's going to happen.
Though it does come in handy.
I just wish i wasnt always right about these things.

So, this fight's about some silly little thing..once again.
But they always are.
Uggh.

Well today hasnt really been a good day.
I text Matt (ex bf) last night, basically telling him to make up his mind whether or not he was going to talk to me and be my friend, or if not, then to not talk to me again.
Unsurprisingly, he chose the latter.
Naive bastard.
So i've been pretty pissed off all day because of that.
I hate him. He fucked me up so much.
He can burn.

I was inspired to write a new blog by checking if Scot had posted a new one..which he hasnt.

Hm..Kris (london friend) is slightly cheering me up by mentioning my modelling :) yey.

Better end this here.

xx

Untouched.

Halloo bloggers. :)
Been a while since i last wrote...ceebs to mess with this stupid pc :L

(8) i feel so untouched that i want you so much that i just cant resist you, not enough to say that i miss you (8)
The Veronica's rock. :D tehe.
New band = All Time Low :D they're ace!!! ♥

Well i've had fun this week at coll :) the weekend with Lh was ace xD got some new shoes (pink ones that match my blue ones!! :P so i can mix and match!)..a funky wallet, a wii game and some other bits and bobs. :) tehe.

Im being cheesy and listening to JLS - Beat Again :L :L hahahaha :P

Obtw, i'm getting Ferrets (or ferts as Farmer Annie calls them!!) next January. :) that reminds me..she told me to watch Farmer Wants A Wife :L hahaha :P she luuurrves Willie. :D

Even though col rocks..i miss Lou loads :( :( buuut..im sleeping over hers this Friday!! xD yeyy!! Gonna go down to TESCOOOOO and get some ice cream too ;) :P and we'll watch 13 Going On 30 :) ohh yess!!!

It's Jodie's bday sleepover next weekend and it's a Time Warp Disco theme..i sooo need a 50's outfit!!!! Which means £££££!! D;
I nearly got a SCAD (basically a bad conduct mark that means i dont get EMA that week!) TWICE so far!! Dwayne's fault!! Haha :P love him though :) he's ace ;D

(8) i left my heart in Tokyo, down by the river don't you know, i had to let it go, nobody no no know's. (8) :) Mini Viva - Left My Heart In Tokyo ;D ACE song :P

I haff a Apple and Blueberry J2o :) im happyyyyyy!! Im a happy haggis!!!
Hahahahaha! Omgosh that reminds me of good times ;)
Ive forgotten why 'the dulex dog' (tehe) asked me to draw a picture of a Haggis. :P
I was proud of that doodle though ;)

...is it weird if im 'jealous' that Josh went out with Jodie last night? :S
I mean..i trust Jo and everything..she IS one of my bff's...but i know that's she's a terrible flirt, and he can be at times..he just doesn't know he's doing it. But that's not what bothers me, it's the fact that she seems to see him more than me!! :/ tisn't fair. She doesnt even go to Bilb and she talks to him and Lou more than i do D; n.mind. ♥ im just busy ALL the time!! Argh.

Ooooo thursday tomo :D :D thursday's are the HIGHLIGHT of my week!! Practical in the morning with Farmer and O' Stubbly One (annie & dwayne), then a free period which we spend in the tv room watching Trisha for 1hr and a half :D then lunch, then just one lesson with Lindaaaaaaa the sheep loverr :) then we go home ;D at 3. (Y) wahey!! xD tis a totally sexy day :D hope we get the snakes out!!! And the ferts!!! ☻ OMGosh i just discovered how to do a smiley face!! :L :L :L ♥☻☺♦♣♠○◘• <>

Pink - Funhouse ♫ :D

Well loons..im off now :D

Toodles!!

Lora :) xx

Footsie Aggers! :(

Owwwwwwwww!!! Im in complete AGONY with my poor footsies :( :( :( :(
I just got the bus to college (even though i dont go on a friday) JUST to literally walk in, put a piece of paper in a box, and walk back out!! : and now i can barely walk.
Infact i just got up to go get an ice lolly (leftover from "summer") and i cant actually put ANY weight on my feet : seriously, i was lolloping around the kitchen. Even standing kills!!!!!

:( and im going shopping tomo!! Argh! :L typicooooo!!

Anyway...having a rave to Ur So Gay - Katy Perry. :) (Y)
Yummy scrumboes, ice lolly! Blackcurrant ;)

College has been pretty ok this week :D got my phone taken off me on Tuesday!!! Boo :( but yesterday was PRACTICAALLLL and got to hold some guinea piggies, chickens, wax worms (like weird maggoty things), tortoise, a terrapin (like a frisky beefburger :L lmao!), a bearded dragon and a tree frog! :D wahey! (Y) :P

Evanescence - Bring me back to life :D (8)

Going to Lh's tonight!!! :D :D well looking forward to it :P hehehehe. We're going into Notts tomo :) expensive times ey! D; haha :)

So me and Josh went to the park t'other day to meet up with Lou, and when we got to the park i had a freakishly strong preminition that Scot was gonna turn up. : and he did! :L :L with a girl i dont know, Reenie and Conor. Haha. :P im officially psychic ;) so we all chatted, and Josh was even laughing at Scot's jokes ;O :L strange times or what? AND Scot offered to hug Josh, and Josh did!!!! I was in shock afterwards :L though i was on Scot's left and saw his face as he hugged him. Hmm..so maybe not BEST friends? :P hahahahahahahaha. :D

Eminem - We Made You (8)
"Damn i think Kim Kardashian's a man, she stopped him just 'cause he asked to put his hands, on her massive gluteus maximus and then, squeeze it and squeeze it and pass it to a friend" :L hahaha. Yes i know the words :P

My feet still hurt :( and ive still gotta finish my assignment, hoover, empty the bins, tidy the living room AND pack my bag! And i can barely move : hmm. :L FAIL!!! :P

That's all for now folks :) ill probbers write at Lh's tonight ;)

Toodles!!

Lora :) xx

Never Gonna Happen..

(8) Never Gonna Happen - Lily Allen (8) :) ACE song!! :D

Howdy bloggers, im back from Liverpoooool :)
And THANK GOD i don't have a crappy Scouse accent, it always sounds like im faking it but it's actually natural when i go into Asda :P

Well today's been pretty groovy :) Except my mutti forgot to bring the coco pops back from Arwahs!! D; Arwah's my Great Uncle btw. Dont ask why i call him Arwah. :L

Went round to Josh's when i got back. :) had tea there. Yummy scrumboes!! :P
College again tomoooooo. :) got ICT first with Annie and Dwayne. :L hmm..should be fun xD haha. :) those two are soo funny ;) im not gonna get anything done like!! :P

That reminds me of when Annie fell over on friday!! Hahahahahahahaha!! Dwayne pushed her and she was stumbling for about half an hour til she fell over. :L LOL!!!

Also been laughing ALL WEEKEND at my mutti in McDonuts. :P she asked...hahahaha...she asked for a McChicken Sandwich MCMEAL!! Hahaha!! xD i said to her - why didnt you say McThankyou? xD

Also..me and Arwah came up with an amusing sketch...
Arwah - What are those?
Me - Sneakers.
Arwah - Why? Do they sneak around? *laughs*
Me - *laughs* yeah, they teamed up with my knickers once and robbed me!
Mutti - *has laughing spaz*
Arwah - What are you laughing at?
Mutti - You two!!

Hahahaha :D oh yushh, we are le MAD foooools :)

My computer is an arse.
A flea's arse.
It's being SUPERGAY. : i am not amused!! (N)

Will stick some piccies on here from today ;)
Attacked Josh with my phone. Mwa ha ha.
Annie fancies him!! Looool!! :L it's like "eh em babe..paws off ;)"
Nah im not bothered really. :)
Tis amuuusssing. :D

Hmm..what else have i got tomo? ...
Ict in L11.
Handling and Husbandry Theory in L4.
Tutorial in R8.
Animal Biology in R8.

Biology? Noooo!!!!! Super boring!! D;

Buuuut....Tuesday is a practical! :D wahey (h5)
Hmm..need to get a locker tomo.
Wonder if i have any spendies from EMA in my bank account yet.. *ponders*

Well...off to rave now. :L might watch a movie actually. What shall i watch? :P hmm...TO THE THINKING MOBILE! ♥

Toodles chums :)

Lora :) xx

Cosmic Blue..

Hallooo thar. :)

Well sorryyy for not writing a bloggity blog last night but i was busyyy babysitting. :)

Had a good larf with Kirstii. (Y)

Helped her stick some piccies onto her enggy book. :)

She's in Year 7 now!! Eep :D

Im officially a college student! ;D

It's vaaaair vair groovy!! :P

I have 5 neww friends :)

They are...

Dwayne - So loud and soooo funny. Totally distracts me like! :P but he's ace. :)
Izzy - Super quiet but v. nice. :)
Annie - Loud and funny. :L She's totally gross and burps all the time which makes everyone rofl. :D But i love her. :L
Hannah - Really really nice. :) sat next to her in Animal Health today and she's cool. :) not as loud as t'others but groovy. And she's nearly 19! :)
Jess H - Yes yes we have 2 Jess's :L she's suuuuuuper loud!! And soooo funny :D Plus she has her nose and lip pierced which look totally ace! :)

Oh i feel loved. :P

Everyone's split into cliques already! Hahaha. :P
We're officially the loud table. :) we've been told off several times already :L hahaha. :)
Biology was soooo hard and booorrrriinnggg this afternoon. Dwayne actually fell asleep! LOL! :)

Get to have a nose around the animals tomo though :) a little tour ;) woop. :D
And we get our timetable. :D hehe.
I know we've got Biology last on monday morning. :L hahaha :P

Going to Liverpooooool tomo evening. (Y) setting off at about 6pmish.
Woop. :) hehe. It's gonna be a loooong trip. :L fortunately i have my iiippoooddd!!! :D ♥

This'll be my last post til maybe Sunday! If not, then ill do one Monday night. :)
Uggh. No interneeet :'(
But i laaaike going up to Liverpool. :) and plus Arwah's taking us out for a meal Saturday night. :)

Mum just told me off for writing this on my blog :L
Tut...noone even knows the address!!!

Off now :)

Tooodddlless!!

Lora :) xx

Who'd Have Known..

(8) Who'd have known :)

Hallooo bloggers :) once again, im listening to my girl-crush, Lily Allen. :P
Oh btw, Josh has a mancrush! Micheal McIntyre. :P well he is kinda cute i suppose. :) hahaha.

Me and Josh went for a spot of shopping uptown this morning, then went back to his. :) watched Micheal McIntyre and Jeremy Kyle. (Y) then Clare (his mutti) dyed my hair puuurple! :D i have piccies! So ill stick one on this blog ;)

Whats on next? Hmm..Ooo Taylor Swift!!
(8) Your on the phone with your girlfriend she's upset, she's going off about something that you said but she doesnt get your humor like i dooo. Im in the room its a typical tuesday night im listening to the kinda music she doesnt like. Shell neverknow your story like i dooo. She wears short skirts, i wear tshirts, she's cheer captain and im on the bleachers. Dreaming about the day when you wake up and find that what your..looking for..has been here the whole time. If you could see that im the one who understands you, been here along so why cant you seeeeee..you belong with meeeeeeee...you belong with me. :) (8)

Anyway..:P hahaha. ♥ Taylor Swift rocks ;)

So..college tomo!! D; scary! I shall write another blog when i get home. :) Jessica's coming round here tomo at about half 8. :L so ill have to get up at quarter pastish. :P God ill be shattered!! Haha :D then ill have brekkie and gooooo. :) Mum's giving us a lift so it's all groovy ;D (Y)

Lily Allen - 22 :) Lh's song :L
She's had her first day at schooly school today. :) woop. ♥
Wish i was going back to school. :/
Bummer. :L

Anyways...i might write again later. :)

Toodles!!

Lora :) xx

All the small things..

Bonjooouuur. :)

Well..last night/early morning was a RIGHT kerpuffle! D; Josh and Scot were talking via Facebook Chat and they werent telling me what about. Fortunately Josh sent me the whole convo. (Y) But still D; i got quite worried.
Me and Josh ended up having another fight last night :/ because appa i reacted weird to the convo once i'd read it. :S hmm. I went quite calm because i knew what was happening. :) and i thought Scot'd be threatening..but fortunately he wasnt. (Y) go him. :L Josh was pretty nice too. So it's all good. :)

God im starving! It's gone 20 to 7 and i havent had tea yet! Grr. Mutti's just put it on. Chicken, cheese and brocolli laticce with satay tatties. :P yummy scrumboes me thinks. ;)

Charging my ipod too. :L woop. Put some pics on it just. :D (h5)

Well im going up to Liverpool this weekend. So you'll have to cope for Friday, Saturday and Sunday without my blogs!! :P But ill be back monday. :)

Start college in 2 days. : : gah.

Well today was pretty fab. :D apart from missing the bus this morning! Lol! Well i got the 11-57 bus to uptown and met Lou, then we got the R2 to Notts and had a good day shopping and chitchatting :D got a new col bag (purple, red and orange! Primark ♥♥), some black pumps for £2!! (also Primark ♥♥♥♥), some felt tips, a pencilcase and 2 cds :) (fallout boy and christina ag)...oh..and some BLUE tights!! :D

So everything's groovy. :P
Im going to Josh's tomo all day. Need to go to Wilko's or somewhere in the morning to buy 2 boxes of purple hair dye. ;) Clare's dying it for me in the afternoon xD hehehehe. ♥

*tummy rumbles* feed me! D;

Might FINALLY watch John Tucker Must Die tonight! Hahahaha :P i've had it for days now and still havent watched it! xD

Off now my chums. :)

Most probably write later ;)

Toodles!!

Lora :) xx

College D;

Drum roll please..as i start college on wednesday D;

Arrrrggghhh!!!

Well i've got some of my stuff sorted..got my hideous GREEN (ew) labcoat sorted..and my steel-toe-capped wellygogs..and normal pink flowery wellygogs. :P and got a MASSIIIVEE notebook, 2 folders, pencils, pens etc.
Just need a pencil case and a bag to put it all in!! :)

Going into Notts with Lou tomo though so it's fiiiiine :D hehe. We wont spend too long in Notts i dont expect. :) ive been to notts too many times last week :L :)

(8) The Fame (8)
Lady Gaga. :) she rocks.

Eeek..cant WAIT to go see Lily Allen!!

Oh forgot to mention my fringe. :P hahaha. Well it's furry and it lives on my forehead. :) 'cause i have a cow's lick parting, one side is really thin and stick out a bit..but never mind..i shall live :) :) i look a bit Cleopatra-y......hmm. :)

(8) Beeatt it!! (8) Fallout boy :)

Oh i bought a New Moon poster today!! :D hahaha. Tonight i plan to take abso EVERYTHING off my walls and stick them all back up again in a diff order ;) although ill probably get up there and be like "...............CEEBS!!!" :P
But i will stick the poster up tonight.
May just have to find a space for tonight. :L hahaha :D
Already gotta find room for my massive 3d one that Clare and Paul (Josh's mutti and vati) got me for my 16th ;)

...i look about 12 with my fringe. :L :L :L
D;

Righto...off now..may post another bloggity blog later :)

Love y'all! ;)

Toodles!!

Lora :) xx

Smiley faces :)

Hallooo!!! ;D

Im randomly in a really really good mood :)

Well i've had a pretty ace day tbh. :)

Started off having to run for the bus with mad hair and a face like a baboon's bumoleys! D;

But met Josh, Bibbs, Jo, Tommi and Chris uptown and off we went to Nottinghaaaaam :D
Then Jodie had to go to the opticians so me, Bibbs, Josh, Tommi and Chris grabbed some Greggs (chicken bake and half a jam donut..yummy scrumboes!!), popped to Primark (the lads actually made me and Lou go!!! D;) and went on this random massive swing thing i went on with Jo and Reen last time we went to Notts. :)
So Jo finally came back, and we went to the arena to grab our skates and goooo!
Me and Bibbs had to tie Chris's skates for him because they failed quite badly! :L :L :L hahaha. :D
It was quite groovy skating tbh. I built up confidence after a while. :) even Josh did!

How everyone skates;-

Me - Super slow to begin with, then quite fast towards the end..but i fell over once! (painful!!!)
Josh - Super duper slow and hanging onto the side, then super fast and pushing self along the side but managed to do it in the middle of the rink after an hour or so.
Jodie - Straight into the middle, v.good.
Tommi - Really really good too!
Lou - V. fast but wobbly and takes everyone down with her. She didnt fall over! But she did make Chris and Josh fall over! :P
Chris - Crazy legs! He manages to go fast but his legs are going everywhere!! LOL!

:) and these are my.."friends" xD love them though. :)

Went to Josh's for tea afterwards, then got picked up by my mutti, then we went to Tescooo :) i bought the book Wuthering Heights (yey!) and John Tucker Must Die which i may watch tonight. Such a funny movie!!! :P Also got Ben n Jerrys Choccy Brownie Mice Cream ;) naaaice! Oh..and random college stuff. :) my college folder is SOOOOOO cute!!! Ill stick a piccie on here sometime :P

Getting my fringe done tomo!! A full fringe :L And have asked Clare (josh's mutti) if she will pleeease dye it purple for me next tues as my mutti is a tad iffy 'cause of the mess. :L

Oh no! They only sell the dye i want in the Boots in Notts!! Which means i have to go to Notts AGAIN!! Ill have to go Monday D; arrrgggghh! College on wednesday!!! ARRRRGGGGHHH!!!!!!!!!!! Need to go to Notts to get my college bag anyway. :) ill ask Lou to come with me. ;)

Right, off now as cba to write anymore :)

Toodles!!

Lora :) xx

A letter to my boyfriend..

I just wanted to get some things straight...
Im not his friend...
I havent been for months now.

Fair do's i may miss him occasionally. That's expected. He WAS my best friend at one point.

But you have to trust me! I love you. You. Not him. Not anybody else. You!
And im not gonna let anything stop that because i'm in this too far to drop out now.

And now im off on a massive ramble with you via fb chat and you'll probably go quiet now..as usual. :/

Ive sacrificed a lot. It was so worth it though. And i wouldn't change it.

Trust.
It takes a lot to build trust.
And a LOT to gain my trust because i hardly ever trust anybody.
Because trust is nearly always broken. Or at least it is in my case.

But you've earned my trust. Yet i haven't earned yours.

What do you expect me to do? Meet up with him? Run off with him? Leave you for him?

All of those are absolutely abserd ideas, and even he knows that.

He's not as evil as you think. He's even given me up. He isn't fighting for me anymore. And he isn't scheming enough to say that and be plotting something behind our backs!! He just isn't like that. I've known him for 2 years and i know he would never do anything that bad.

It's not that im sticking up for him. He's done some pretty shit things over the past 5 months. Some were mean, backstabbing and nasty. But he's also tried to let go. Which is the best thing he can do.

We need to just move past all this hatred. Because it's one sided. He doesnt hate you. Sure he may say bitchy things behind your back, but he's allowed a bit of leeway for that because it's him who loses. We "win." Actually you win. You win me. Wow. All this fighting just over me. It's so not worth it you know.

I've said it before, and i'll say it again. "i know who i can and cant live without" :/ <3

Ok..so now you're trying to freak me out by telling me you knew i was gonna post this. :L congrats, slightly scared ;) although i've come to expect these things..obviously. :P

Sorry for the rather harsh points above, i need to let my stress out some way :) and this is far better than down the phone or at my mum. :D

The blank facts..
1. I love you.
2. I'm not going to leave you for anyone.
3. Scot is not my mate, but i do talk to him occasionally, although unless there's a problem, it's him who talks to me first. It is VAIR rude not to reply and he usually has something interesting to say.
4. You need to trust me when i tell you not to hurt him. It's not going to accomplish anything. I'm gonna be hurt because you didn't listen or trust me when i asked you not to. And he wont hold back. This is the only guy who can knock my feet from under me and catch me so easily i feel like little laura. :L
5. I know now that you're my soulmate. I dont feel the need to be told that you love me. Because i know that you love me. And i hope you know that i love you. And i know that we'll have a brilliant future together. Just as well we want the same things in life. :)

That's about it :)

Just remember, i love you :)

Yours for all eternity,

Lora :) xx

Lazy days..

Hallooo. :)

Felt like a different font and colour today :L

Well i've done abso NOTHING today :P proper lazy day! Just been on the pc.

Me, Josh, Lou, Tommi, Jodie, Lucy and Dale are all going ice skating tomo appa. :)

Josh's been trying to get in contact with Tommi to find out the details, but couldn't..so i've now taken over. :P mua ha ha. ;D

Ice skating + me = pretty darn hilarious ;D

Last time i went was with Lou, Shaun, Scot, Kirsty and Azzy for Shaun's bday. To cut a vair long story short, Lou fell over 8 times. I didnt fall over at all. Scot fell over and grabbed onto my jeans to hold himself up..pulling them down. : Lou managed to drag everyone BUT ME down with her. :L Was a fun day though. :)
But it ended with blisters and a very very cold bum. :D hahaha.
Me trying to run in skates is pretty hilarious too ;)

Should be a good larf nevertheless. :)

The boys still havent sorted anything out. Hmm.

Tis a straaaange world. :)
I shall put some piccies on this blog that i got today ;D

Toodles!!

Lora :) xx

Hatred..

Hmm.

The world is coming to a very hateful place at the moment. :/

Im not liking it.

Wuthering Heights <3>

Im feeling very deep this evening/nearly morning, rather than my usual shallow self. :L

Well theres been a massive thing going on between Josh and Scot at the moment. I genuinley fear for the both of them. :/ Scot is so powerful that he could break Josh in an instant. But if Scot breaks Josh, then he has me to face. I may be weak but you'd be surprised how formidable i can become when you upset me. Scot has at his hands, a chain reaction. If he kills Josh, then he dies. Then i probably die. Though i have friends and family to think about and im not suicidal..im just stating some facts. :L i dont want to die, but nor do i want the two of them to fight.

Josh needs to realise that he will not be able to break Scot.

Scot scares me sometimes. I know what he's capable of.

Ive told Scot that if Josh taunts him or tries to attack him in any way, to NOT do ANYTHING back.

Nothing at all.

And ive also told Josh not to do anything to Scot. Because Scot rarely listens to me.

The two of them need to stay out of each other's lives. Forever. No good will come out of fighting. Only pain.

On a bright note...i have two new favourite quotes..

"if all else perished, and he remained, then i should still continue to be. But if he should perish and all else remained, then i should cease to exist."

"i cannot live without my life, i cannot live without my soul."

Both from Wuthering Heights. :) (and twilight ;P)

Night bloggers. :)

Toodles,

Lora :) xx